28 July 2005

This Gen- Part 1

I have been pondering as of late the weaknesses/problems/shortcomings/opportunities of my generation and hope to enumerate them.

Number 1 is loyalty. In continue to see loyalty failing to take hold in us. We flutter from job to job, experience to experience and never appear to give a solid commitment of more than a year or 2. We tend to be of this mindset-- if it doesn't work find something that does.

My generation will change jobs and even vocations more times than our parents. What created this occupational migration? I think a few things have contributed. First dissatisfaction has driven us to find those things which satisfy us more. I was taught in school you should do what you enjoy. Second, mobility and freedom. We are more single, marry later, and branch out more from the nest. Third, the world is changing faster in the information driven age.
Even among Christians I wonder who is committed to the church. Isn't being part of his people part of being "in Christ." Yet I see my generation detached from the church while claiming to be "in Christ." Church hopping has become a trend in the West. Churches are viewed as a commodity I chose carefully (good) but can fling off like a dirty garment if the experience begins to chaff at my skin.
Faithfulness, patience, and committment will be tests to this generation if they hope to fulfill all that God has for them to do.

Odd jobs

I have been odd jobbing since end of my Well Fargo ride.
One I got to assemble computers from 6PM-6AM. I got terminated after 2 days because I was too slow.
I then returned to Kaye's Printing and the friendly confines of the web room for a few days. Then yesterday I was on 2nd floor assembling baseball cards for distribution at the Red Hawks game. Later that day I assisted Phil in creating a driveway. We did not drink beer but had a lot of watermelon in the evening.
In between all this activity I have been hard at work writing and researching a movie script for late summer and early fall production. No title has been given to it. It is a detective mystery based on the "mute" detective Mark Time I had created for the Kevin Myers Show years ago. Mark Time is not really mute, he just choses not to use words. However, you can here him think.
Well, I got to get researching.

A separate peace?

It began as a relaxing normal day. One, in which I should have taken more advantage. However, I rested. Then there was the bathroom ordeal where the toilet connection broke causing water to flood a portion of the basement.
However, that event is not nearly as predecent or historic as the announcement that the IRA (Irish Republican Army) have official disbanded a a para-military organization. To me it is good news because I have been praying for peace in the "North of Ireland." This announcement is certainly a further step in that direction. Gerry Adams even alluded to Ecclesiastes when he stated: "There is a time to resist, to stand up and to confront the enemy by arms if necessary. In other words, unfortunately, there is a time for war... There is also a time to engage, to reach out and put war behind us. This is that time."
No doubt many are skeptical of such rhetoric. Actions do speak louder. Even after the Good Friday Accords enacted a cease fire, the IRA still opporated. Now the network is called to disband and disarm.
Yet the doubts are not unwarranted in Irish history. Secret militia societies have been a thing of Irish history since after the Great Famine during the Land Wars. It may not exist in name but definitely could slumber beneath a polarized Northern Ireland. However, I am hopeful.
Certainly the recent bombings in London have brought many memories of the IRA's tactics and perhaps tried to link today's terrorists with them. To me it is a hard sell. The only thing that links them is passion.
I hope that passion can now united a troubled land that needs the blessing of peace.

21 July 2005

Out on the prairie

I did get a chance to retreat to the Sheyenne Grasslands this Friday previous. It was not what I expected it to be, for good and bad.
First the bad. The bugs were very dense. Opening one's mouth caused one to get a mouth of squito. It was hard to be outside of the tent in the evening. Fortunately not one bug was found in the tent.
The most excellent part was a terrific camping site in a grove nearby to a water source. Plus, no cattle surrounding me in the morning. The moon gave some great light and there were trains in the night. One of my favorite sounds is a training passing in the night. My site happened to be situated by some tracks. However, the trains were fairly silent.
I had planned to do some writing and reading but did not get to do either. Also I had planned to brainstorm my latest movie idea but that got waylaid by the squito and fatigue. Instead I hiked.
One interesting thing happend as I was hiking to the site. Coyotes had surround me. They were cowards and refused to show their faces. They just howled incessantly as I passed.

Times they are a changing

I never heard the Dylan tune but I suspect that it may give some theme to these days.
I have lost 2 jobs in 2 weeks in addition to being given less than thrilling news about what I believed to be a potential relationship. Now, I am wondering what other sorrows can fall upon me. What shall be my end?
The 2nd job I lost was building computers from 6PM unitl 6AM. Interesting but the hours were long. I got the axe after only 2 days.
Oh, how the times they are a changing......

14 July 2005

Jobless freedom - 200th post

It is kind of fun to be free of work.
Yet it takes discipline to stay disciplined when out of work.
Lead worship at SIMT and took in the missions sessions these past 2 days.
Buddy Walker told some interesting missions stories. One in particular about a missionary and a special aircraft called a Super Helio. This aircraft was fitted with speakers and was used to preach while flying over areas of Central America. Now that is my kind of propaganda.
One statement stood out to me about being a world Christian: That we are pilgrim’s camping between God’s purposes for this world and their fulfillment. This seemed to verify what God communicated to be in Ireland- “You are a pilgrim.”
Home has never had a strong pull for me. Just in viewing circumstances of my life I see an itinerant calling—being here for a time and then elsewhere.
Anywhere He'll lead me, huh?

12 July 2005

An abrupt ending on the wagon

Seems like my stint on the wagon has been cut short. So now I must trust in someone greater to provide for me.
Farewell Wells Fargo, again!
Until we meet again :)
Slan Abhaile.

Blog and self redux

The Royce Files got a bit of a makeover. I just changed templates. I should probably do some proofreading but I assume my readership is not hankering for improved grammar, spelling and stylistic choices. Perhaps I need to think of self-promotion of this thing.
In the aftermath the incident I called "Independence re-Emerged"-see previous entry- I felt I needed to re-evaluate, re-cover, and re-imagine too. I need a whole self redux but have no liberty to take that personal retreat, yet.
Rejection is never simple to deal with. Even near rejection is not a piece of cake. Why is that so? Well, I think a lot of it has to do with perception. From one incident our minds and our hearts perceive things that are not actually there. I may think I am cut off from the land of the living but really it is just a realization that my romantic intentions (no matter how noble) will not be realized.
Is there freedom from this syndrome?
I am not sure we can avoid the dreaded rejection. It is always around the corner from me. I think we can be shielded from its ill-effects: depression, self-hatred, anger. I think there is some room for sorrow but our self-worth needs to be secure elsewhere.
I could pontficate more but will digress.

07 July 2005

Numb independence

It was not the best of weekends.
No, it ranks near the bottom of the barrel. Even my tire blow out weekend was better. At least I did not lose sleep this like during "firework."
I had premonitions of inevitability seeping from my head. Something was awry.
As it turned out my Independence Day foray reaffirmed my own independent status.
There I was parting ways on the most delicate of emotional connections while strolling through a generic part of the neighboring town. It seemed expected. It was the day I dreaded. A numb feeling sort of engulfed me as I took in the conversation. It was by no means what I desired. Far from it. I believed that this was the missing piece.
I pursued it silently and it ended silently. A mere blip on the map I suspect.
Passion dies a cold hard death.
I felt like crying but could not.
It was not until the next day that I actually lost it as I was listening to some music. I had to leave work.
The emotions gushed out. I felt abandoned, rejected, failure, self-hatred....then numb as if they were instantaneously frozen.
And I still grieve.

02 July 2005

The dog on the knoll

Hope waits patiently for those who plan to breech the heights of Lehigh .

Hope is an Austrlian Shepherd of no reputation.
There are rumors that she is a wily chaser of coyotes.

Oh the issues

Came accross this website that addressed some hot button issues concerning Christianity. It is not comprehensive but did provide some insights on the controversial issues addressed.
It is published by Mercy Church in Sioux Falls, SD, a new church start-up. They appear to have a trendy appeal judging by the website. They seem to know who they are and what they want to become and they've only been around for about a year.
What troubles me in our group is that we do not quickly pursue that identity through sorting out our vision, values, and mission. It's been almost 4 years and I have no idea what our specific purpose is as a church. It seems that our focus is on the Downtown of the 'Go but what is the how?
I think this lack of cohesive vision stems from the ideal of not wanting to be limited but be open to every opportunity. This "shotgun approach" keeps us from being pigeon holed as this type or that type. Personally I don't like be pigeon holed but as a church should there not be definition and targets to aim for? Now is a time for definition.

Extreme what?

And now that Sandra Day O'Connor plans to step down from the Sumpreme court, who will fill her shoes? Some extremist, right? Apparently NOW feels that way. It is as if the extremists (in their minds) have taken over. It is all relative I suppose. One's extremist is somebody's rational centrist. More rhetoric. More marches. When is anybody going to find common ground?
Of course there is the big one that perhaps we will never have middle ground on- abortion. It should be an incredible battle. The nomination showdown that has been building up for years. It's possible there could be 2 of them in this term.
Oh how fickle Americans are.